Monday, July 16, 2007

Actual Due Date

Henry has this funny little habit of flaring his nostrils, as you can see in the picture above. He does it all the time. I tell him it's only cute right now because he's little, but it might not be so flattering when he's older. I'm not sure he's listening or cares.

Yesterday was July due date. It is sooo strange to look at Henry and think that he should still be inside my belly. And really, I was convinced that I would be at least a week late (considering that 70% of first pregnancies are). Even with as little as he is, he still seems awful big for being inside my body. Even though my labor/birth experience was a little haywire (to say the least!) I am still soooo glad that I am not pregnant right now. Those last few weeks were so miserable and stressful...and I am soooo happy to get to spend time with our little man. He's only been here a few weeks and I can't imagine it any other way!

Quite a few people have asked me what it's like to be a mommy and if there's anything that has surprised me or is different than what I expected. I've been around and taken care of little kids for years, so the changing diapers and soothing a crying baby are probably a little more natural to me than for a lot of people (I once met a girl who at 8 months pregnant confessed she had never changed a diaper!). The thing that totally trips me out is that I'M the mommy. For years, everyone else has been the mommy...and now it's ME. That's just weird. Even stranger is that while Henry may not be able to feed himself, know his name, or be able to speak, he knows that I'm his mom. He can be crying and someone can be doing their darndest to soothe him, and all I have to do is hold him...not even say anything, and he instantly stops crying. I am still stunned speechless everytime this happens. How on earth does this little creature know from touch alone who I am? I'm really not that special. I have no magic powers. I'm just Jeannett. And that is so humbling. That we have a God so big and mighty, yet he is also a God of detail. A God that puts little eyelashes on my son and tiny fingerprints on his thumb. A God that can create the heavens and the earth, but also takes the time to give a newborn a strong sense of who his mom is. I am always shocked over and over again that there are people out there who are parents and yet fail to believe in God. As cliche as it is such a miracle. Truly. I (like most moms, I'm sure) find myself just staring at Henry. Shocked that he is my son (and that I'm not just babysitting), enamored by his cute little features (and how much he looks like Daddy), and in awe of God's might.

After a bath. Kid loves bathtime! That Paci is bigger than his face!


Peggy said...

You are not "just Jeannett". You are the one that God chose to be mommmy to Henry. Again just that tiny detail that makes Him more awesome and leaves us speechless. I have so enjoyed spending the time with you the past few weeks. Thank you for letting me a part of it.

Peg :)

Lara said...

"A God that can create the heavens and the earth, but also takes the time to give a newborn a strong sense of who his mom is."

I love this line. What a beautiful post!
I still have those moments when i just can't believe that I have a daughter. Crazy!

Peggy said...

Ugh!! I hate typos!! mommy not mommmy!! I guess I was carried away with my thought at the moment. Peg ;)

Brianna Heldt said...

having your own child is so different from babysitting other peoples' kids. i love hearing your thoughts on the newness of motherhood.

for me, i mostly just have moments where i can't believe i'm the mother of four! i feel like in so many ways i'm still trying to find where i fit in life. ever since we got engaged, our age hasn't matched our life phase for the most part. (married at 20, baby at 22, now four kids at 26.)

glad you're so in love with little henry, though how could you not be! he is so stinkin' cute!

Mary Kay said...

Henry is just the cutest thing. He has changed in just these 3 weeks already. He is lucky that God chose you both to be his parents. Your're doing a great job! Thanks for making the trip down this weekend. I know it was stressful for you, and I so appreciate your sacrifice.

Kate said...

i know exactly how you feel jeanett. mommy-hood is such a miracle, a beautiful glimpse of how our god looks with such undeserved love at us...amazing.